Weight watchers is a losing game...

The plan worked! To some extent, lost 1lb this week taking me down to 13st 7.5lb. Slowly slowly catchy monkey....

Very rough start to the week- suspect I'm going to have another video-nightmare in tomorrows class which wont be fun. Might just 'forget' to wear my glasses so all I see is a blur. A not particularly attractive blur...
But I did a bit better with tracking and I upped my excercise considerably so I clearly managed to make up for the emotion-binge-of-doom.
Similar plan this week:
1. TRACK. Bringing paper tracker with me to uni, but going to do my best to stick to meal plans so its easier to manage. If I track everything everyday I'm rewarding myself with BIG SHINY BRACELET OF JOY! watch these wrists...

2. MEAL PLANS. Make it. and actually STICK to it this week.

3. EXCERCISE. WILL try body combat. Going to wear my pedometer as often as possible.

4. VEGETABLES. Eat them.

Here goes everything....

One kick too far...

I was doing great with being back on track. Staying the same at WI had given me just enough of a kick up the bum to get myself in gear.
But then came class- we're doing a video-performance module at the moment, and I had to watch myself on screen. It made me cry. A lot. I managed not to actually cry in lesson but I was GUTTED and cried all the way home.
I looked atrocious.
Even if the camera adds 10lb I had to have had about 20 cameras on me to excuse the way I looked.
Watching it my mind was screaming'STOP EATING FATSO', but when I got in from class I was physically hungry and so told myself I could eat some tea and stay on track....
fool.
Pretty much devoured the cupboard.
I've said it before and I've said it again- I CANNOT KEEP SNACK FOODS IN THE HOUSE.
Its just too dangerous for me.
Trying hard to get back on track now.
Yet again, here's my line
_________________________________________________________________________
fresh start.
again.

Just keep tracking, Just keep tracking...

So far so good.
Got up early and went to the gym with L&L-my gym buddies. I feel SO much better for it! In the time I'd normally have slept in I have earned myself 7 activity points AND feel really rejuvenated and good. Annoyingly I've lost my gym membership card though so I need to do some MAJOR searching or I'll have to pay a tenner for a new one :(
Nice healthy breakfast, all tracked perfectly. So so far my weekly goals are going as follows:

"1. TRACK. I'm going to make sure I have a paper tracker with me at all times. This will get uploaded onto the computer at night for ease of referral to later, but I need some way of tracking while I'm in uni." I have my paper tracker in my bag for if I snack at uni, but so far today I've tracked everything online Including my excercise!

"2. MEAL PLANS. Haven't made one for ages. Needs to be done. Going to make one tonight."
Done and DONE! made one for the week last night which a)requires no shopping at all this week and b)which has been followed so far to the letter. Apart from a chocolate crepe- but that was pointed(2.5points SO nice), and just exchanged with some of the other snacks on my plan. I am IN CONTROL.

"3. EXCERCISE. Gym tomorrow morning. Going to try body combat on friday(which might well slay me- watch this space for detailed descriptions of my sweaty death). No more buses- I cant afford them. STOP USING THE BLOODY LIFT AT UNI!" Gymed it this morning, as described, and we're planning to go again tomorrow morning. So far so good.

"4. VEGETABLES. Eat them." Not had any yet today(what vegetable goes with blueberry cinnamon cereal?!) but having a big salad with my lunch and did have some fruit with breakfast. Clementines are GORGEOUS right now!

I'm back! WITH A VENGEANCE!

Renewed Vigour

is what I need a healthy dose of.
Hopefully I've just got it.
I stayed the same this week, making me still 13st 8.5lb.
I've been losing very small amounts for a few weeks now, which has been frustrating in more ways than one.
Firstly, it's obviously annoying not to be getting bigger losses than this (1.5lb off in 3 weeks is a bit dismal).
Secondly, and more importantly, I've really needed a kick up the bum, and haven't gotten it til now.
I've barely been tracking for weeks, and I used to be excellent at it. I've been eating way over points on rubbish food daily. But I was still, to a small extent, losing weight. So I carried on.
It's clearly beginning to catch up with me and it's time to CHANGE.

So here's my line
___________________________________________________________________________________

and here's my plan.

1. TRACK. I'm going to make sure I have a paper tracker with me at all times. This will get uploaded onto the computer at night for ease of referral to later, but I need some way of tracking while I'm in uni.

2. MEAL PLANS. Haven't made one for ages. Needs to be done. Going to make one tonight.

3. EXCERCISE. Gym tomorrow morning. Going to try body combat on friday(which might well slay me- watch this space for detailed descriptions of my sweaty death). No more buses- I cant afford them. STOP USING THE BLOODY LIFT AT UNI!

4. VEGETABLES. Eat them.


That should do the trick.

The Question of Identity

Light is bouncing off of some molecules onto your retinas.
You are looking at a collection of molecules, nothing more.
You've never seen them before.
Previous molecules may have closely resembled them, but these are the only ones which exist.
They didn't exist in this format 20 years ago, or yesterday, or at breakfast.
Nor will they exist in an hours time, or on Saturday, or in 76 years from now.
Oxygen is being drawn in and throughout these molecules, and processed into Carbon Dioxide, which is expelled.
These elements are only a part of the molecules you look at for a few seconds.
This "body" has varied in length and height. It has varied between 15 stone in weight.
Right now it is 2 stone lighter than it was 4 months ago.
These trousers don't fit anymore.
That extra body has been converted into kinetic energy and carbon dioxide and is now circulating the earth on it's own. It does not belong to these molecules anymore.
Due to the existence of synapses and neurotransmitters these molecules have made choices which when combined can be called a personality- though this is in no way personal- it is merely the product of genetics and societal interaction.
At any point over a 20 year span you may have called these molecules a
straight lesbian bisexual
middle class
left wing
atheist agnostic humanist buddhist wiccan pagan
actress ballerina archaeologist astronaut undergraduate
geek goth mosher hippie
baby child teenager young adult
female
short sighted asthmatic
claustrophobic agoraphobic arachnophobic acarophobic sociophobic
omnivore pescatarian vegetarian
blonde haired red haired pink haired purple haired green haired
short tall
shy outgoing
hopeful romantic broken hearted cynic
ticklish non-ticklish
person.
Call me what you will.


For one of my classes I had to create a 3 minute solo performance about what makes me 'me'.
Since I don't really believe in a 'self' this is what I came up with. I found my weight loss to be a very interesting part of the equation. Not just mentally, but physically I am two stone less of a person... 

Just a quick one...

then down the pub for a quick one ;)

Lost half a pound tonight but more excitingly...
SIZE 16 JEANS!
:D
for the first time since college....
woop woop!

Sorry I've not been around much lately- My course is VERY time consuming which makes things kinda tricksy. So here's the official catch-up post!

Current Weight:13st 9lb

And heres how I got on pledgewise:

October Pledges

1: Make a meal plan every week, and base shopping lists around it.- I wasn't too bad at this at the start of the month, and actually stuck to the plans for a while but it's all tailed off recently.

2:Try at least one new recipe per week.-Not happened yet. must try harder! I will learn how to make risotto.

3:Go to at least one excercise class a week.-Now quite one a week- but I HAVE been to spinning more than once, and I've been alright at getting down to the gym.

4:Keep losing weight at a steady rate of 1.5-2lbs a week-mainly small gains or 1lb losses.

5:Set regular times to go to the gym and stick to them.-ughhh nope.

6:WATER! DRINK IT!-epic fail. Just got addicted to 7 up free.

7:Halloween does NOT have to mean sugar.-actually pretty good on this count. It just happened to mean a lot of alcohol instead...

And, rather late, here are some for November...
NOVEMBER:
1:Meal Plans. Make them. Follow them.
2: TRACK EVERY DAY!!!! Even the binges. I need to keep doing it!
3:Learn to make risotto.And keep trying new recipes.
4:Make time for the gym- it IS a priority.
5: WATER. DRINK IT.
6:Make packed lunches rather than buying sandwiches at uni.


I really need to be back on track- I have been decidedly stupid of late and I really need a reminder of why I'm doing this.
-I may have lost over 2 stone so far but i am STILL massively overweight- theres a long way to go still and I need to remember that!
- I'm going down to Brighton for Christmas and I want to do some decent shopping in the lanes!!!!!

Must. Try. Harder.

On a completely unrelated sidenote, a couple of drops of rosewater tastes amazing with porridge.
rosewater on porridge