Wednesday 8 June 2011

*waves white flag*



I surrender.
I admit it, I've been awful.
Utterly dreadful.
I haven't been to a meeting in three weeks.
My tracking has been all over the place.
I've been a mess.
I've been having a seriously emotional time of late. Finishing uni has been incredibly sad and incredibly stressful.
Apart from a couple of blips I've probably actually been undereating (if I'm a bit emotional I tend to eat my feelings, If i'm extremely emotional I don't tend to eat. It's not healthy either way, but I'm at least starting to see what I do), so I don;t think weight-wise I'm too off track right now.
But I need to get into this again before another three weeks go by, and then another three, and so on until I'm back at big, fat square one again.

I think I'm going to be doing a lot more weight loss blogging in the near future as I've just started dating someone who is a recovering anorexic, and I don't want to talk too much about weight in front of them, so I'll be doing it here instead.
I also really need the support of this wonderful community because for the past few months I haven't been going about weight loss in a very healthy or productive fashion. The binges and secret eating were getting way, way out of control, and I was getting seriously addicted to those horrible, twisted 'thinspiration' sites.
I realised I was getting way in over my head and cut myself off from them completely, but ended off cutting myself off from all things weight loss related, including weight watchers, which is stupid because I know I can do it healthily and it works for me.
From now on it's the healthy way. And it's serious.
Graduation is in 5 and a half weeks, and I want to look GOOD.

3 comments:

  1. How kind of you to not want to talk about weight loss to a recovering anorexic! As a recovered anorexic myself, I have to say that that is key to a lasting relationship (for me, anyway). I had an ex who would bother me about my weight, even knowing my history. Yeah, that's why he's an ex!

    Anyways, I'm glad to see you back to your blog. :-)

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  2. It's better for everyone that way, I know I'm not hurting anyone and I'm much less likely to get drawn into bad behaviours myself!

    It's good to be back. : )

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  3. Lovin’ your blog!
    Hiya! Newest follower – found ya via’s Leah’s SHOUT OUT on her blog leah: the kind weight watcher-- please stop by and say hello! Would love if ya followed back!
    ♥cyn♥
    The Purple Goddess

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