Bierbeck

I think that's how it's spelled? I've just got back from a week in the Filmfabriek house/studio thing with the rest of the group and our director Peter. Im gonna jump right in and say it was my absolute idea of hell. I'm really not enjoiyng myself at the moment anyway, and I'm a person who REALLY needs some alone time now and then, preferably every day.

I didn't get any.

And I mean ANY.

We woke up at the same time
ate breakfast together
worked all morning together
ate lunch together
worked all afternoon together
ate dinner together
watched a film together
went to sleep in the same room

repeat ad nauseum TIL I WANT TO PUNCH PEOPLE.
Even the shower had a smoked glass wall that you could totally see through.

Right next to the kitchen.

I'm so glad to be back in Maastricht where I at least have my own room.

I'm really glad to be at least a little bit more in control of my food now. As you may have guessed with the same mealtimes we were all basically having the same food, cooked and bought by Peter.

Peter said he was vegetarian which was a big plus for me. But then we arrived and every floor had real fur rugs everywhere which was nauseating.

And then he told us he eats fish. Now, I'm fine and dandy with people who are pescatarian or macrobiotic for health reasons, and just don't eat red meat because it's unhealthy, but he told us constantly that he doesnt eat meat for ethical reasons. Which makes fish eating incredibly hypocritical in my books. And if there's one thing I can't bear its hypocrisy.
So anyway, he was cooking fish for most people and for me and the one other veggie there it was vegetables with some kind of pasta or potatoes, or occasionally...just more vegetables. Every night. I haven't had a decent bit of protein in a week. And the veg wasn;t WW friendly either, it was absolutely drowning in oily, buttery sauces. Which I LOATHE. If I'm going to have lots of veggies I like to be able to a) taste them, and b) not feel like I've eaten a greasy fry-up afterwards. It was awful.

He did have scales though, which said I was 14st 5lbs. So I need to stop eating shit ASAP.
Time to get healthy.

One or the other.

Not both.

I'm not on plan while I'm in Maastricht (for those of you wanting to see my Netherlands pics check out my new blog www.theymightbeshiny.blogspot.com , they'll be up on there soonish).
My mealtimes have been pretty healthy, lots of veg and protein and generally filling foods, but the other stuff is likely to sabotage any chance I have of losing, or even maintaining my weight over these next few weeks.
Most nights after classes everyone heads to the bar. There is a lot of dancing but also a lot of cherry beer(nomnomnom) getting drunk. That might not be too bad if it weren;t for the fact that I have developed a serious pick'n'mix addiction. There's shops full of it. And it's all so PRETTY.

But the beer is nicer. So from now on I'm imposing a pick'n'mix ban. And a major cutback on all sweeties...
I can have one or the other.
But not both.

Maastricht

I'm on a 6 week exchange program thing in The Netherlands, and whilst I'm here I'm not officially following Weight Watchers. But I have high hopes for not actually gaining all my weight back again.
I'm living with the three other people from my course, who are all pretty skinny and healthy, so I'm basically eating what they eat when they eat it. There has been pizza and ice cream and the lovely lovely haageslag(amazing chocolate sprinkles you hjave on bread-the taste of my childhood.) but there has been no snackage. Also, we are walking everywhere, this place is very explorable. And the classes we are in...jesus I'm aching. We did so much running yesterday. I nearly died. And I'm aching like hell. But another 5 and a half weeks of this and I might actually be back on track!
You may not be seeing much of me- I'm busier than the busiest bee, but I shall do my best to stay vaguely on the right track so when I come back to you it's with my head held high!

Tipping Point

First things first. I gained. Again. Half a pound. Its totm so I know I shouldn't beat myself up about it too much, but I actually cried when I waled out of my meeting today.
Last week I gained 4 and a half pounds. I knew why I'd gained them, but I had no reason for it. I wasn't as bothered as I should have been. But this half a pound was the tipping point. Enough is enough.
Seriously.

I need to get this considerably oversized ass in gear.

However. And this is a BIG however. On saturday morning I am flying to Holland. For a six week project. Therefore - No meetings. Super hard to calculate points. Cant bring all my trusty scales and recipe books with me. I can see this going horribly wrong.
Does anyone have any advice on how to stay on track? And what decent veggie food there is in Holland? That doesn't consist primarily of cheese...
Any tips would be welcomed.

But I AM determined to stay on track as best I can.

Partly because I JUST GOT MY FIRST EVER BLOG AWARD!

Thank you Fatlittleblackdog !
So here's what I have to do...

1. Get really excited that you got the coolest award ever!
2. Choose one of the following options of accepting the Oh My Blog! award:
(a) Get really drunk and blog for 15 minutes straight, or for as long as you can focus.
(b) Write about your most embarrassing moment.
(c) Write a “soundtrack of your childhood” post.
(d) Make your next blog a ‘vlog’/video blog where you’re basically talking to the camera about whatever.
(e) Take a picture of yourself first thing in the morning, before you do anything else (hair, make up, etc) and post it.
3. Pass the award onto at least three, but preferably more, awesome bloggers and let them know.


I'm choosing option 2. This may not be the most embarrassing thing EVER but it happened last week and it still makes me cringe just thinking about it. Ok, here goes.....

Ikickedapineconeatanoldladyinthestreet

I am a bad person. By accident. IT WAS BY ACCIDENT. You see the pavement was totally clear, as spotless as a pavement can be. But lying there was one colossal great pinecone. Just sitting there. Mucking up the pavement.

It seemed to be taunting me...

"Look how round and prickly I am. Like an inanimate hedgehog. Only without the squee factor. Kick me. KICK ME. FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND SHINY KICK ME NOW!"

My vision focussed solely on it's presence, I became unaware of all that surrounded me. I had only one goal in life. To kick this pinecone as vigourously as I could to see how far it could possibly go.

I didn't see the old lady walking towards me.

But she evidently heard me cry "LOOK AT THE PINECONE!" as I ran towards it, flailing my limbs every which way.

I drewe my leg back, and with more power than I have ever kicked anything(which is not actually very much power at all) I kicked the cone. And it flew towards her. And didn't stop. 

When it was halfway through the air I noticed her. And I noticed the pinecone's distinct lack of stopping. I think I looked a little something like this:

It didn't hit her in the face. That would have been horriffic as opposed to embarrasing. But it did bounce off her legs and into the road. She laughed. I nearly cried. Never, EVER will I forget the day I kicked a pinecone at a pensioner.

And finally- the three worthy people I bestow this award upon....

*drum roll*

1)The fabulous Ms Bitch Cakes   She's won plenty of awards already but she is, and continues to be, one of the most inspiring bloggers I know.

2) The Kittehs for the giggles :)

3) And finally http://101reasonsihatebeingfat.blogspot.com/ for always giving me motivation and ideas when I'm lacking in either!

The Upside of Hayfever

I cannot smell a thing.

My housemate is preparing for a fundraising bakesale tomorrow.

 

Note: My housemate is not this man.

She has been baking for 6 hours now.

BUT I CAN'T SMELL THE CAKES.

Which I think makes me about 60% less likely to go into the kitchen and eat them all.

Win.

Very Sleepy

So...very...sleepy. It's been a LONG day.

Ok, so as many of you know I have been seriously off track for quite some time now. Last week it reached it's zenith(Is that the right word? It feels right and I like it so it's staying. Zenith zenith zenith.) with the week of uncontrollable ridiculous eating.
Dominos pizza
chinese
wagamamas
more dominoes
cake
more cake
BBQ
SO much cider
tons and tons and tons of sweets
and a hell of a lot more.

For no reason other than sheer laziness.

This week I gained 4.5lbs.
Taking me back up to 13st 12.5lbs.
Which mans I've had to revert some of my mini goals list to their original state.
Which SUCKS.

But it's also proved a huge kick in the pants.
Going around the supermarket today I just repeated to myself "Four and a Half Pounds. Four and a Half Pounds." And it actually steered me well clear of disaster.

This morning I got up early and walked half an hour to the gym, worked out for an hour, walked the half an hour back, walked the half an hour to Uni, rehearsed for three hours, and then walked back.
I'm knackered.

In a very good way.

AND I'M WITHIN POINTS TODAY! -as long as I include my activity points, which I do.
That is EPIC for me!
I'm giving myself a high five for a day back on track.

And now I'm going to bed.

(Also- I have just experienced the joys of 30 Rock. WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN ALL MY LIFE?<3)

Report Card: Spring 2010

As you may be able to tell from the frequent absences and "drawing a line" posts, I've been way off track of late. I decided to read through all my old blog posts to try and get back some of the oomph I had last summer and came across my "Report Card" post. I think It's time I revisited this. And Any of you who have been wavering I reccomend you join in and post your own! Even if you are an exemplary WW-er then fill it in to show us what we're aiming for!


So heres a little game/excercise for everyone.
Fill in your own-give yourself a grade from A to F,and how you think you could improve over this next term...if it works i reckon we should do it every term!
Blog your's and please link me to them, I'd love to see how they work for you :D

Here's mine...

FLORRIE'S REPORT CARD:APRIL 09

P.E.(are you getting 30mins excercise everyday?)
Grade:D
Plan:Haven't been to the gym at ALL this holiday. GOing to put some fresh batteries on the Wii Fit and get back onto this.

English Lit:(Are you tracking everything?writing down everything you eat?)
Grade:F
Plan:total failure here. Nothing tracked. Repeated gains. Tracking works for me, I NEED TO DO THIS EVERYDAY STARTING FROM RIGHT NOW.

English Language:(are you using positive can-do language to motivate yourself?)
Grade:C-
Plan:I've been pretty defeatest of late but I'm feeling the inklings of a second wind blowing.

Maths:(are you using up the right number of points per day?)
Grade:F
Plan:This goes hand in hand with the tracking. I have no idea how many points I've been eating- I just know its more than I should have.

Science:(are you eating a balanced range from all the food groups?)
Grade:B-
Plan: Fairly balanced, though with a tendency towards carb-heavy laziness. And rubbish breakfasts. Just rubbish.


Food Tech:(are you experimenting with new recipes,foods and methods of cooking to ensure variety and enjoyment in your diet?)
Grade:B
Plan:Not so much these last few days but last week I did a lot of cooking from my new WW recipe book which shook things up nicely! COntinue this for other meals, not just tea-time.


History:(Are you aware of your past habits so you can avoid gaining weight in the future? Do you read success stories for inspiration?)
Grade:B
Plan:I'm aware of my habits and pitfalls, I just seem to have lost motivation in tackling them.

Art: (do you have before (and after?) photos for your eventual success story?)
Grade:B
Plan:I haven't taken them yet -I just have some 'incidental' before shots - but i have a black unitard thing so while I'm at home with a full length mirror I will take some semi-before/current shots.

R.S.: (do you have faith in your ability to attain your goals?)
Grade:C-
Plan:The faith has been slipping away. I know I have it within me to do this! I just need to keep reminding myself of this every day!

Textiles:(are you aware of clothes that suit your figure to give maximum positivity and confidence to you on your weight loss journey?)
Grade:B
Plan: I know exactly what suits me, though i need to stop buying clothes that I'm only going to fit for another few weeks!

ICT:(do you make full use of the esource technology? the tracker,the recipes,the stories,the chatrooms...)
Grade:C-
Plan:I have been getting back onto the chat boards a lot more often, but i need to start making use of the tracker again!

Note To Self

Food consumed at other peoples houses still contains calories.

Food consumed outside your house still contains calories.

Food snuck into your room and eaten in secret still contains calories.

Cheesy chips snuck off your brothers plate still contain calories.

Drinking martini with the girls all night definitely still contains calories.

Kindly cease and desist.
Yours,

    Your still considerably oversized body.

Easter Holidays!

Home again Home again!
Went to my old WI meeting again, to many people saying how good I look and how well I've been doing...or so it must have seemed to them. I feel like I've been a bit of a mess when it comes to keeping up with WW at uni. Yes I have gym membership but I don't go as often as I should. Yes I can do the half an hour walk to uni and back each day, but if I'm offered a lift I never turn it down. Yes I can write menu plans but I'll rarely stick to them. All in all some habits need a major makeover.
I gained 2.5lb this week taking me back up to 13st 8lb which sucks, but I was expecting it. The last week of term always involves eating up whatever's left in cupboards before I go home, so I've been living on pasta and pesto and...ok...ben and jerrys.
Not good.
Howeverrrrrrrr....
At my meeting I won the raffle and got £7 to use in the shop which went towards buying the filling foods cookbook. I've planned it out so I'm trying a new recipe every night for dinner. Last night I tried the sausage and potato hotpot with quorn sausages for 4 points which wasn't bad at all and was definitely very filling. The recipe calls for using 150 ml of cider though- and once that bottle was open there was no going back... Ended up drinking the rest of the pint which tipped me over the edge of my points for the day.
Also made the chocolate brownies which weren't actually very nice, very flat, very gooey, bit of a mess.
Hopefully tonights recipes will go better!

Feeling Proud

This last week I've not been very strict at tracking, though I have been thinking a little more carefully about what I eat. I also have had assessments so I've been rehearsing all hours of the day and night.
It was my housemates 21st bday party last night and it was a seriously messy one - I invented the most lethal cocktail ever, dangerously delicious and VERY strong. So it's all a bit of a blur and I'm feeling rough AS today. Setting up for the party meant I missed last nights meeting, but today I decided that wasn't a good idea and that I probably needed to do some major damage limitation so I found another meeting nearby and hopped on a bus. Clearly the WW karma gods wanted to reward me for turning up because somehow I've managed to drop 1.5lbs this week!
Very surprised.
Happy surprised!
Glad I decided to go because I had assumed I would have gained this week, and just slipped even further off track. I'm all motivated and raring to go now!
Just as soon as I've slept off this hangover...

Confession

I haven't tracked for three weeks.  I've binged for three weeks. I've gained for three weeks. I haven't cared for three weeks.

I've had a guy I like like me back for three weeks.

I think I see a correlation.

It's a MASSIVE novelty to have someone find me attractive, to make me feel like I look good, to make me feel I am sexy. So my ego has shot way up lately. Thus I haven't made an effort with WW because I'm feeling too good to focus on feeling better. If that makes any sense...

But I remeber how much thinner I was feeling three weeks ago, I can vividly recall the sensation, and I felt better then than I do now.
SO I need to remember:
-It ain't over yet.
-I'm going to feel better the thinner I get
-I only felt this good in the first place because I've got rid of about two stone so far

And so I really need to stay on track. I refuse to let this slide any further or I'll be back where I started with frightening speed.

Plannage

I've spent the last couple of weekend staying at the boys digs in leeds, and as a result have been eating out, overeating and not tracking. Consequently I've had 2 weeks gain in a row. Which is stopping right now. At my meeting last night the eating out books were on sale, and I've lost my old one, so I got a new one and wont be caught out by being away again. I've also made a menu plan for the week which I AM GOING TO STICK TO!
I'm also going to try posting what I eat and drink on here again, that worked really well for me last time.

So far today:
2 Eggs (scrambled) with a splash of skimmed milk (3)
Tortilla (2.5)
Tabasco (0)
Welches Light Grape Juice(300ml) (1)

Yummy.

And I have my pedometer on. Going to do a big session on the Wii fit now because I have a party to go to tonight and I could do with some extra points in the bank!

*edit*

Lunch was a giant salad of deliciousness.
Butterbeans (1)
Sweetcorn(1)
Cashew nuts (1)
Dried Cherries(1)
Sunflower Seeds (0.5)
Mushrooms (0)
Cherry Tomatoes(0)
Lettuce(0)
Orange Pepper (0)
Green Pepper(0)
Radishes(0)
Celery(0)
Pickled Red Cabbage (0)
Cheddar Cheese (2)
Tabasco (0)
Lemon Juice(0)
Black Onion Seeds (0)
Olive Oil (1)

And I attempted all the muscle workouts on the Wii - didn;t manage all of them anywhere near perfectly, but I didn't die!

15% Off!

At last nights meeting I weighed in at 13st 4lb - taking me 1lb past my 15%!
It's been a while since I've hit one of these mini-milestones but it does feel great.
I think I may have gotten my second wind with this WW malarkey.
Fingers crossed I can keep it up, I'm only 1lb off my 5th silver 7!

Week of Accountability - Day 7

This weekends a bit of a mad one. We are celebrating-
- My 21st belatedly, because I got really ill last time I was home
-My mums birthday
-My brothers girlfriends birthday
-Valentines day

Anyhow it means that we had a slap up brunch of
2 Croissants (approx. 10)
1 Pain au Chocolat (approx. 6)
2 tsp sunflower spread (2)
Jam (2.5 ish)


Yum.
Veggies for the rest of the day however...

Week of Accountability - Day 6

I was out in Leeds for an awesome day of shopping(Chrisoper Kane for topshop dress for £6.30 anyone?!) and going to see my friend Chris in The History Boys at WYP (Brilliant. Amazing. Go see it right now. It's touring everywhere)
Anyhow -food was reasonably ok-ish though hard to point. I'll get back to you on it

Breakfast:
Big bowl of shreddies
skimmed milk
2 tsp brown sugar

Lunch:
Slice of Pizza
Green Salad (0)

Dinner:
White Chocolate Magnum
Fentimans Ginger Beer

Week of Accountability - Day 5

Super quick one
Breakfast:
Nesquick (1.5)
Skimmed Milk (0.5)
Cereal Bar (1.5)
Biscuit (1.5)

Lunch:
Veggie Chorizo (2)
Butter Beans (1.5)
Olive Oil (2.5)
Quorn Ham (0.5)
Lettuce (0)
Rocket (0)
Radish (0)
Celery (0)
Cucumber (0)
Mushroom (0)
Tabasco (0)
Lime Juice (0)
2 Mini Pitta Breads (2)

Snack:
Chocolate (6)

Dinner:
Cheese and Tomato Baguette ( estimated 9)

Well I've not done very well today :s
AND i forgot to wear my pedometer, though I've done the same amount of walking as I have most days recently so I can estimate I've earned around 3 activity points.
Still, that sets today at
28.5/24

Damn.
And I'm at home from uni for the weekend so these postings are going to be sporadic and estimated.
I'll see what I can do.


*editeditedit*
Havent had time to work out points properly but there was a moment of insanity involving 4 digestive biscuits, a bit of french bread and some butter.

Accountability Week - Day 4

Another Lie-in. Another Brunchy day. I'll try to make this one less snacky.

Brunchyness:
Special K Creamy Berry Crunch (3)
Skimmed Milk (0.5)
Banana (1.5)
Macaroni Cheese [I was craving it something rotten] (1.5)
Mini Pitta Bread (1)

7.5/21 so far.

*edit*
Went into town to get mum a birthday present and ended up eating
27g Port Salut Cheese (2)
Pear and Almond Tart (9.5)
Chocolate Egg (1)

oops.

So thats 20/21 for now...

*edit*
I was hungry and knew I'd gotten points on my pedometer so for tea I had

Dinner:
2 Mini Pitta Breads (2)
Vegetarian Brussels Pate (1.5) -YUM!
Rocket (0)
Cereal Bar (1.5)

This takes me to 25/21 Points
Plus
Pedometer: 17510 steps (5)

Equals 25/26 Points.


*editedit*

Damn my housemate making pasta and filling the house with hunger inducing cheesy smells.

Just ate (devoured)
veggie crisps (1.5)

so 26.5/26
dammit.

Accountability Week - Day 3

Feeling guilty about last nights binge. TOTM and having chocolate in the house is a very bad combination.  Need to do some excercise to account for that one. Not going to get a lift to and from uni today, shall walk it instead. And I'm doing physical theatre rehearsals for 3 hours so that ought to earn me some bonus points! If I'm not completely knackered afterwards I'll try and drag myself down the gym, but I'm not sure what today will entail so no promises there.

Slept in rather late today so This first one is more of a brunch deal...

Brunch:
2 Mini Pitta Breads (2.5)
Extra Light Soft Cheese (1)
Quorn Smokey Ham Slices (0.5)
Tabasco (0)
Harvest Chewee Bar (1.5)
Vegetable Crisps (1.5)

*edit*
Very late, very sleepy.
 Dinner:
Curly Kale (0)
Cabbage (0)
Green Beans (0)
Broccoli (0)
Sweetcorn (1)
Olives (1.5)
Houmous (1.5)
Sweet Potato (2.5)

That was all lovely but i've been really snacky all evening so I'm going to have to add...
 Snacks:
Cereal Bar x 2 (3)
Fudge Bar (2)
Babybel Light x 3 (3)
WW Berry Kisses Fruities (0.5)

22/21 Daily Points
 Plus
Pedometer: 13805 Steps (3.5)

Therefore
22/24.5

Accountability Week - Day 2

 I feel like this accountability project is really making a difference in my habits already. I went and did a big food shop last night (after spinning = the time they've just reduced all the veg and stuff! shall do that more often) and I found myself thinking things like
-If I buy the multipack of fudge bars, I'll end up eating them all in one go, and then I'll have to write about it.
-This blog will be really boring if I just eat the same foods constantly. Lets see what's new and exciting to get- Hence vegetable crisps, mini pitta breads, and a massive variety of veggies!
It's definately making me think twice.
I also got myself a little reward for if I complete this week honestly - a VERY cute little red plastic beaded necklace with a bow on it...
Even If I dont come out of this week with a perfectly balanced within points tracker, as long as I have actually tracked everything I can have it.

I didn't get off to the best of starts today. I slept in very late so didn't have time to eat a proper breakfast, and forgot to bring any lunch so I've just been picking at bits and pieces whenever I've had a break from lectures and monitoring the Soldier's Song project, and not making the best choices.

Breakfast(Kind of -I've just grouped together the morning snacks)
2 Small Bananas (2)
Apple (0.5)
2 Cereal Bars (3)
Vegetable Crisps (4)
Water (0)

Lunch (Grabbed in the canteen- points approximated)
Baguette (4.5)
Cheese (4.5)
Salad (0)
Dr Pepper Zero (0)

So far thats 18.5/21
And my pedometer is up to 1 point so far.
I'm walking to WI tonight to get the points up a bit more, and will be dipping into my saved points to have some tea when I get back.

*edit*

I lost 2lb at WI tonight! YAY! somethings going right :D

I ended up getting the bus there because i was running late, but it drove straight past me afterwards and I ended up walking back. clearly the WW karma gods paying me back for not being punctual!
at the meeting they had various samples of bars and cakes that someone had made out of one of the cookbooks and I had some, and then was starving on teh way back so ended up buying a snack which means my points are now
Evening :
Cake sample (1)
Chocolate sample (1)
2 Mini Babybel light (2)
Tesco 'low fat(yeah right)' hazelnut yoghurt (3) (3! for a low fat yoghurt! thatll teach me to go out without my points caluculaor again!)

Pedometer is up to 16439 steps which gives me an additional 4.5 points so today is
25.5/25.5!
wow that worked out nicely :p

and im going to go have some 0 points veggies cos im still not full.



*edit again*
ughhh screwed up.
Had a moment of insanity and ate
2 cereal bars (3)
tons of bloody chocolate (7.5)

cant keep it in the house.

so today basically adds up to:
36/26 points (i got another 0.5 on the pedometer)
And today being WI day its the start of a new track week so i dont have the spin class points to make up for it.
Damn.

Accountability Week - Day 1

I've strapped my pedometer on tight. I'm feeling a definite sense of renewed vigour.
Here goes everything!

Breakfast:
Oats(2)
Shape Fat Free Blueberry Yoghurt (1)
Chopped Walnuts (2)
Elderflower Cordial (0.5)
Water (0)

Lunch: (Packed because I'm in lectures from 1-5)
MASSIVE SALAD OF YUMMINESS:
Cherry Tomatoes (0)
Red Pepper (0)
Celery (0)
Salad Leaves (0)
Lime Juice (0)
Tabasco (0)
Black Olives (1)
Sweetcorn (0.5)
Chopped Walnuts (1.5)
Black Eyed Beans (3)
Olive Oil (2.5)

wow that salad was yummy...

Dinner:
2 Quorn Fillets (1.5)
Jerk sauce (0.5)
4 Stuffing balls (4)
Cherry Tomatoes (0)
Yellow pepper (0)

Anytime Snacks:
Black Coffee (0)
2 Skittles [very silly amount!] (0)
Vegetable Crisps (2)


22/21 points eaten.

ACTIVITY:
Spinning (7)
walking- I accidentally reset my pedometer but it had got to 0.5 points by then and I've walked quite a bit more since so I'll take a conservative estimate at (1)

Which means overall today Ive had
22/28 points.
And I'm saving the rest.
I'll be going home this weekend for my mums birthday so I suspect I'll need the buffer!
And also...
Very proud of myself. My lecturer brought in valentines chocolates to share around the class and I just passed them straight on :D Yay for self-discipline!